Solo travel advice for all my fellow socially awkward friends!
Travel can be stressful for all of us. If your flight is delayed or you’re stuck in traffic it will likely stress anybody out. But some things might stress us out differently depending on our personality type. While extroverts may experience travel stress when they aren’t able to connect with family and friends on the road, introverts can feel overwhelmed when having to interact with locals, go on group tours, or navigate public transportation.
Believe me, my first few times solo traveling, I felt extremely out of my element. It was difficult to feel confident when communicating in an unfamiliar language, and if I didn't come prepared to move independently through a new city (such as checking out the public transportation options beforehand), it was difficult to ask for help. I also had some anxiety when booking group tours, where everyone else seemed to get along so well while I awkwardly stood off to the side somewhere. Travel for introverts is analyzing and experiencing every moment to its fullest; having the space to observe and quietly take in my surroundings is important to me, and when I feel too overwhelmed it's easy to get overstimulated and I end up mentally checking out.
The basic difference between introverts and extroverts is that introverts draw energy from recharging alone, while extroverts draw energy from recharging with others! Introverts can enjoy socializing but on their own terms. I love just "being." I rarely feel bored when I solo travel – I always have my mind, some music, or a good book to occupy me. Sit me on a park bench, and I'll be happy and fulfilled for several hours. Seriously, guys, it’s a beautiful life.
When it comes to travel, especially for first-timers, it can take a minute to adapt to a new experience. So, here is my best advice for introverts when it comes to sliding into the experience of solo travel!
1. You don’t have to stick to group tours
Spending the day (or several) with 30 strangers can be extremely draining, keeping you from enjoying the places you visit. From time to time, splurge on a private tour. Unfortunately, they are more costly than group tours, but it might be worth it for you to feel better during your trip! Plus, you’ll get a more authentic experience of the country you’re visiting. For example, you can do a private trek, a cooking class, or a city tour.
If you choose a group tour, find a tour operator with small groups. Of course, there are also a lot of places you can visit on your own, without a guide. You wander around on your schedule and observe the destination for yourself. If you do some good planning, you can have a really great time discovering new places in solitude!
Solo travel isn’t truly solo unless you want it to be. Traveling is all about growing and taking in new experiences at every step. Plus, traveling alone doesn’t mean you should isolate yourself completely! Don't avoid group excursions completely. You might enjoy yourself that much more when exploring under trained guidance and being accompanied by like-minded people. Try splitting your time between solo and group exploration to find a balance between "me time" and social interactions.
2. Write in a journal
It’s often said that introverts write better than they speak, and that’s the case for me! Journaling helps us to dive deeper into our minds and experiences, putting down on paper the intense feelings and transformative encounters we’re having. It’s the perfect activity for a cafe, park, beach, or countryside setting!
Travel often brings up to the surface a lot of strong emotions because it’s a change of pace, a reset, and a time when we’re observing so many things differently than we’re used to. Journaling about what you see, think, and feel helps you connect more profoundly to the destination and the local culture, as well as to process the things going on in your life in a new environment. Anything on paper leaves a deeper impact on you and a cathartic peace that’s difficult to explain to less sensitive people.
3. Headphones + a book when you’re not up for chatting
Ever been on a plane with a chatty seat buddy when all you wanted to do was relax? Introverts will enjoy it for a bit, but likely not for the whole flight. On my flight to Barcelona, my seatmate talked to me non-stop, asking about the book I was reading, why I was going to Spain, etc. It was fine at first, but bro could not take a hint, even when I stuck my headphones on and stared resolutely out the window. The guy finally stopped talking when he fell asleep, probably too tired from running his mouth for three hours. Geez.
The same can happen in a park, cafe, or common areas at a hotel or hostel. If you prefer to spend uninterrupted time with yourself, stick your nose in a book or put your headphones in. They’ll get the idea. Hopefully.
Quiet, slow, and individual activities are my favorite. These are the moments when you recharge. I even feel excited to socialize again. Do not take them for granted! And don’t let anyone intrude on your personal time of self-care or make you think it’s unimportant.
4. Stay in an AirBNB
AirBNBs are probably the most comfortable lodging to travel when I'm really seeking some me-time. There’s no front desk staff to watch every time you come and go from your temporary home. It feels more like a real home away from home, a unique place you can experience.
You won’t have to eat out at every meal if you’d rather be alone because you’ll likely have a kitchen. I love to observe details, so staying in a personal home nurtures that passion. Hostels can be loud, and the pressure to socialize is heavy, not to mention opening the bedroom door to see 5 strangers staring back at you. Hotels are always bustling with daily activities, and breakfast is often in a room full of people. Even with a private room, it doesn’t feel so private. Plus, AirBNBs are more eco-friendly! It’s a win-win.
5. Slow travel is blissful, and quiet time is necessary
When I first started traveling, I had FOMO. I fit as many things as possible into every day and as many destinations as possible into every week. I’ve since learned that was a mistake, and it made me miserable. I may have seen a lot of places, but I didn’t experience anything at all. Slow travel is the best way for introverts to absorb the environment via natural osmosis, not a rushed list of to-dos. Travel less, see more. Form a deeper connection with one destination instead of seeing just a snapshot of several. You can do that on the internet from home, after all.
Adding “spend 3 hours listening to music, reading, and sitting on the riverbank” isn’t wrong for your travel itinerary. When planning your itinerary, leave open spaces for you to adjust the day to your mood. Plan in blocks of quiet time to relax, recharge and do those things that make you feel whole. If you visit a lake and love the view, spend time there just feeling all the sensations it gives you. Don’t rush on to your next destination, even if that means you miss it altogether.
P.S. – No need to feel guilty when you want to avoid other people for a while.
6. Do your own thing sometimes, separate from your travel partners
I've traveled with friends before, and while I love them dearly, spending a week or two with a group of people can get pretty draining. You don’t have to be connected to your travel group at the hip. If you want to do a slow activity and they prefer to spend the morning doing a tour, then do that! Maybe you’d prefer to spend a few hours wandering around a museum and taking it all in, but your buddy wants to go to a festival. That’s ok! You will each have a fabulous experience tailored to your needs and preferences, and then you’ll come back together afterward and share how your day went! No one will feel like they’ve missed out on something or been pushed beyond their limits.
Communicate your needs, preferences, and travel style within your group before you leave! It’s a nightmare to sort out personality differences within a group once you’re already on the road. There can be much frustration and hurt if everyone isn’t understood and respected. Make adjustments so that each will feel comfortable and excited about the end result. Listen to your travel partners, as well, and help them accomplish the things they’d like to, compromising if that doesn’t match up with your own preferences.
7. Go coffee shop and park hopping
I love to be around activity but I don't always feel up to participating in it. I like to carve out some time each day to spend a rejuvenating hour in a park or cafe, two places where I can do something without doing anything. That will ramp you up for the afternoon or evening activities! When I travel with friends, we usually reserve an evening for nightlife, and after a day of recharging at a park or cafe, I usually feel much more up for a bar or club by the evening. If you can go early in the morning, it feels like the world is still sleeping. You’ll see people peacefully watering their flowers, sweeping, or reading the newspaper. And if you're a daydreamer like me, this will seriously fulfill your fictional scenarios. Trust.
In most cities, there are so many of these places to choose from! And they’re so cozy, definitely the places with the best vibe. When I was studying abroad in Europe, the first thing I did in any city was sit in a coffee shop for a while. It was a perfect, slow introduction to the new city, plus I usually got travel tips from the barista. This is a great time to write, plan your itinerary, or edit all the pictures you’ve been taking!
8. Get into the wilderness
Dramatic spaces of rugged wilderness seriously set my soul on fire. When I visited Switzerland, I must have cried like ten times. Big mountains, blue rivers, and soaring landscapes as far as the eye could see. There’s nothing like it; it’s absolutely ethereal. It’s an opportunity for extreme mindfulness, endless observation of new things, and life-altering sensations.
Being outside is a soul detox from the busy, crowded, and loud world you manage in your daily life. Nature is a natural cure for the anxious mind we know all too well. These wonders are fuel for any passionate observer and daydreamer. You have the physical and mental space to breathe and grow undistracted. You feel free!
The world’s natural wonders are the most important reason I travel. And there are no two landscapes that are the same anywhere in the world. There’s variety and excitement, and we indulge our adventurous side while nurturing the mind and spirit.
9. Take baby steps out of your comfort zone
Travel for introverts is a great opportunity to challenge yourself. Puff yourself up, and let yourself be uncomfortable from time to time! Take a language class, and then go to a restaurant and order in that language. Book a group tour, and initiate one small conversation. Stay in a hostel dorm for one night. Go out on a date while you’re traveling. Ask someone what their dog’s name is while you’re relaxing at the park. Join a Meetup just once!
These things seem simple, but I understand they can cause anxiety! Each time you push yourself further, it’ll be easier the next time. You’re allowed to rest before doing it again. The things that were once hard will start to feel normal, and then you can go just a tad further. In a place where you don’t know anyone, there are plenty of excuses to try something new.
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